YELL   Youth Education Life Line

Condoms, latex surgical gloves, and plastic wrap are the best way to protect yourself and your partner from STD's and HIV, but they're not foolproof. You've got to use them correctly every time you have sex.

The best condoms for anal and vaginal intercourse are lubricated latex condoms. Always use latex, because lambskin condoms don't block HIV and STDs. (Polyurethane condoms are a new alternative to latex)

Using lubricant will make things go smoother and give you added protection. Lube is especially great for women the first time you have intercourse, or if you tend to get sore. But always use a water-based lube (such as KY, Astroglide, Wet, Foreplay, or Probe). Oil breaks latex. Don't use vaseline, hand creams or lotions as a lubricant. Also, treatments for yeast infections contain oil and will break latex. Oil is good for salads and cars, not for condoms! You can buy water-based lube and condoms at the drugstore.

Women can use vaginal foams or jellies. Always use a condom.

It is no longer considered desirable
to use nonoxynol-9 in lubricants

To be safest if you're going to suck your partner's dick (blowjob), put a condom on it first. Try non-lubricated or flavored condoms for this. Do not get cum in your mouth, because you might have a sore throat or small cuts on your gums (especially after you've brushed your teeth).

If you're doing someone with a sex toy -- vegetable, dildo, vibrator, or whatever -- put a condom on that thing! Don't switch the toy from butthole to vagina, or from one person's body to another, until you put a new condom on it.

Here's what you do:

1. Make sure your condoms are fresh -- check the expiration date. Throw away condoms that have been very cold or hot or that have been carried around in your wallet or run through the washer. If you think the condom might not be good, get a new one. You and your partner are worth it.

2. That dick has to be hard before you put a condom on it.

3. Tear open the package carefully, so you don't rip the condom. Careful if you use your teeth.

4. Make sure the condom is right side out. It's like a sock; there's a right side and wrong side. If it's inside out, it won't unroll easily. You'll see when you practice.

5. If the penis is uncut (uncircumcised), pull the foreskin back first.

6. Hold the top half-inch of the condom between your fingers when you roll it down. This keeps out air bubbles, which can cause the condom to break. It also, leaves a space at the end for the cum.

7. Roll the condom down as far as it will go.

8. For anal intercourse, use lots of lube. Lube is great for vaginal intercourse, too. Put the lube on after you put on the condom, not before -- it could slip off. Add more lube often. Dry condoms break more easily.

9. Guys -- if you cum in the condom while having sex (it's safer not to cum inside), hold the condom near your balls and pull out while you're still hard.

10. Don't leave the condom in bed with you. Throw it out. If you have intercourse again, or with another partner, use a new condom. Never reuse a condom or cum twice in the same condom.

Guys, practice putting on a condom in a comfortable place where you have plenty of time by yourself. You know what we mean! Practice makes perfect, and you'll impress your partner. Girls, practice putting a condom on a banana or zuccini.

Some people think that putting on a condom is too much work when you're supposed to be having fun. But it's easy for condoms to be really fun and erotic.

Be creative! __Protect yourself and others.  

Coalition for Positive Sexuality 


  Sex and Death    By the AIDS Writers Group of Search for a Cure

Toward the end of the social revolution of the 1960's, respected psychologist Rollo May gave a speech at Northeastern University. He warned that the heart of a culture is not changed by the popular crusades of the moment, but by fundamental changes to the unwritten values, beliefs and codes that govern societies. These unspoken mores are far more powerful than the laws and institutions which embody our aspirations, not the realities of our everyday lives. He warned that within the very freedoms we are attempting to embody in our liberation movements lurks a puritanical streak.

AIDS is a problem mainly because we do not accept that sex is as basic a need as sleeping and eating. An unwritten belief consistently held by this and many other cultures that sex is sinful, that pleasure will and should be punished, and that pleasure seeking is at best frivolous and at worst satanic, has made us sex sick.

How cultures value and regulate sexual expression explains a great deal about AIDS and why it still continues to haunt the world. AIDS thrives upon the sex sickness of cultures including ours. How else can you explain a preventable sexually transmitted illness sweeping across the world? A society's inability to even talk about the behaviors involved in its transmission because they involve sex best explains the medical disaster of a viral illness killing more people than any epidemic in the history of the world.

It is easy to identify the sex sickness of our society. Sex education classes showing videos of sexual activity would be picketed, while video games having children practice killing people and videos normalizing violence are ignored as part of normal American culture. Everett Koop, appointed U.S. Surgeon General by President Ronald Reagan, insisted to no avail that grammar school children learn the facts about safer sex. He was speaking out against the cultural illness. His failure to make a dent led David Satcher, Assistant U.S. Surgeon General under President Bill Clinton to have to warn over a decade later that the epidemic "will kill more people than any of the terrible conflagrations that have marked this century." (Journal of the American Medical Association, 4/28/99,

America's sex sickness also explains how the Boston Globe series on AIDS in Africa could dismiss the problem as the sex sin of "promiscuity" in its primary headline to explain United Nations' Secretary's General Kofi Annan's announcement that AIDS is killing 5 thousand Africans every day. ( the Globe did not mention that, according to the Treatment Action Coalition of South Africa, the country gives out 7 condoms per sexually active person per year, that condoms cost more than most people could possibly afford, and that American based pharmaceutical companies sued to stop South Africa from making cheap copies of American antivirals).
Our sex sickness also explains how the United States chose to ignore the success of Holland's sex positive efforts to teach young children about safer sex which have led to the lowest HIV rate in the world. The rate in the U.S.A. is three times higher.

This sex sickness makes it impossible to be honest and accurate about anything related to HIV. For example, over the past 15 years of the epidemic, how often have we heard the idea that AIDS is making people afraid of sex and that this destruction of the joy of sex is a major reason to find a vaccine and cure for the illness? Every other reason to fight AIDS is put forth-deaths, the loss of productivity of young people, the orphaning of children, the economic effects of the disease. But not the damage AIDS does to having sexual fun, for fun is suspect and sexual fun is sinful in our culture.

Our sex sickness does us harm in many additional ways. For example, after 15 years of the epidemic we don't know accurately how risky various sexual practices are and under what circumstances. Studying what serodiscordant couples do and don't do would be a powerful way to evaluate what sexual practices are least risky, as such couples have one partner HIV infected and the other not. It is widely believed that such a study was never financed by the NIH in order to accommodate the influence of an increasingly antisex Congress. The only information we have is from a limited survey pioneered by Dr.Kenneth Mayer of Brown University. It was privately funded, and ended after 5 years, having gotten all the information that a small study can provide. What is so unfortunate is that sex will happen anyway--and in the absence of more knowledge, people GUESS what practices might be safer.

Some that can use condoms don't. People who are not using a condom have assumed that not ejaculating inside a partner is useful in helping protect both parties from HIV. For many years the use of non oxynol-9 , a spermicide present in some condom lubricants, was believed to reduce the chance of HIV transmission. The only study suggesting this was privately done on a small scale in Amherst, Massachusetts. Some studies suggested otherwise but no real analysis on the possible appropriate uses of the drug or any other drugs in lubricants have been done.

Only now, 15 years after the epidemic has begun, are any microbicides being tested in a few people. But not in a way which will tell us if they work. The lack of the development of microbicides, easy to make but expensive to test, is best explained by noting they are by definition efforts to find ways to have safer sex. As a result, there has been no political voice for what is obviously a method that validates and supports sex.

This sex phobia is reflected in many ways, but one ironic way results from the invention of Viagra. Viagra is a safer sex drug. One of the most significant stated reasons for non-use of condoms is that for many men condoms cause them to lose erections, but not with the use of Viagra. An analysis of this contention could be done and we could rationally decide if the anecdotal reports are correct. If they are, Viagra and other drugs that help maintain erections would reduce HIV transmission, and should be funded by HIV programs.

We ought to be able to admit that sex is an important part of our lives. We ought to be able to admit that studying how to have sex safely is urgently needed. It is sad that so obvious a hypocrisy is allowed to kill us. For, if we did not really believe and want sex, if it were not really a tremendously important activity for all of us, then how do we explain the fact that after the FDA approved Viagra in April of 1998, it sold more pills during its first two weeks than any drug in history. Shall we pretend it is simply because people like the taste?

This Boston AIDS Writers Group panel consisted of David Scondras, Robert Krebs, Stuart Pynn, and Jon Hultgren . Stuart Pynn took charge of fact checking, and Dr. Kenneth Mayer provided us with material on discordant couple studies. The AIDS Writers Group is coordinated by Search for a Cure, a non-profit HIV Treatment and Education organization.

NEW REPORT    The Sexuality Information and Education Council of the U.S. (SIECUS) releases its new publication: SIECUS State Profiles: A Portrait of Sexuality Education and Abstinence-Only-Until-Marriage Programs in the States.

SIECUS State Profiles is the result of over two years of research into federally funded abstinence-only-until-marriage programs. This new resource details the amount, type, and use of federal abstinence-only-until-marriage funds in all 50 states and the District of Columbia. The publication also chronicles controversies related to sexuality education in each state, lists relevant state statutes, and provides contact information for state-based organizations involved in sexuality education and sexual health issues.     

"We know what works. When young people have access to comprehensive and medically accurate information regarding their sexual health, they delay the onset of sexual activity and increase their condom use. It is high time that state and federal lawmakers, including the Bush Administration, stop putting political expediency ahead of the health and well-being of our young people. They need to halt funding for unproven abstinence-only-until-marriage programs that deny young people critical sexual health information, and instead, fund comprehensive programs that work," said Kreinin.

 To view the complete publication, visit

Guidelines for sex in the 90´s

Abstinence can cause incredible anxiety, frustration, depression, disease, violence and a whole host of other destructive forces. If you like sex, then don't give it up.

Because we are now in the AIDS era, it is essential that we let go of old ideas of how sex is "supposed to be". We have to find new ways to be intimate and express sexual feelings. Learn that sex is about intimacy, not the way bodies touch.

If you've been repressing your sexuality because of the fear of AIDS, you don't need to. Realize that AIDS is caused by a virus and not by your sexuality. There are ways to be sexual without risking any exposure to AIDS.

Eat well, exercise, and pamper your body.

Stop complaining that sex isn't the way it used to be and that you hate condoms. Get over it and accept reality. Learn to love latex. Acceptance of the reality of the AIDS era will reduce fear and frustration and bring awareness and compassion. Educate yourself on safe sex practices.

We are all in the right place at the right time in our sexual evolution. Our sex lives, like the rest of out lives, go through many phases. We learn from all our experiences including our "mistakes". Allow other people their own paths and follow yours.

LEARN ABOUT YOUR BREATH  Sexual and orgasmic energy travel on the breath. Breathing techniques can make sex much more powerful and satisfying. It's possible to have an orgasm from breathing alone. Is this the SAFE SEX of the future?      by Annie Sprinkle

Health risks associated with sex

In this first decade of the 21st century the various risks connected with having sex have (alas) increased. The figures for HIV, Chlamydia and gonorrhoea are all going up. This is almost entirely because so many people – whether they're heterosexuals or homosexuals or 'bi' -- don't practise safe sex.

Britain in 2005 is a pretty promiscuous place. Statistics show that men and women are taking more and more sexual partners. Crazy practices like going to orgies, joining sex clubs and indulging in ‘dogging’ (multiple sex in car parks) are quite widespread. In the male gay world, ‘cottages’ and multi-partner saunas continue to be fairly popular.

And in many of these situations, people don’t use a condoms!

As for teenagers, unfortunately they are now losing their virginity very young – and frequently at an age where they don’t have any idea about how to protect themselves against the unwanted consequences of sex. So inevitably, there are times when teenage love-making, instead of being beautiful and fulfilling, leads to disaster.

Understandably, in all age groups a lot of men and women think that ‘it won’t happen to me'. But in the year 2005, there is so much sex infection around that you really do need to be very careful. Unless you are totally faithful to one partner – and he or she is totally faithful to you – you are at some risk.

What are the risks of unsafe sex?

The chief ones are:
* unwanted pregnancy.
* venereal diseases (such as gonorrhoea and, much less commonly, syphilis).
* other sexually transmitted infections (such as herpes, pubic lice, and viral warts and especially the 21st century‘s chlamydia).
* HIV - the virus which can cause AIDS.
* cancer of the cervix.
* female infertility – due to pelvic infection caused by sex with an infected guy.

It’s almost inevitable that other sexual infections will arise during this century – especially if the human race keeps going in for unsafe sex!  Germs have a nasty way of exploiting people’s behaviour, which is why – soon after the swinging 60s and 70s -- herpes and HIV suddenly emerged.

Back in the 20th century, many people, both straight and gay, enjoyed sex with a variety of partners assuming that there was very little danger. Unfortunately, this is no longer the case – since disease rates have increased so much. Today, it’s only common sense to practise safe sex.

What is safe sex?

You could say that the only totally safe form of sex is masturbation. Technically, all sexual activity with a partner carries some risk, though the danger of infections is practically non-existent if the two people are completely faithful to each other.

‘Petting’ with the hands is a relatively safe form of sex, and is certainly much less risky than intercourse. So if you’re a teenager and you can keep to hand-petting (rather than ‘going all the way’), you definitely be safer.  What about ‘petting’ with the mouth? This is a bit more risky, since it can pass on infections like gonorrhoea and herpes (and very rarely syphilis). But at least it can’t get you pregnant!

Who is at risk?

* People who do not practise safe sex, especially if their partners originate from areas of the world where HIV is widespread - Africa (south of the Sahara Desert), Asia and the Caribbean Islands.
* Homosexual and bisexual men who do who not practise safe sex and have many different partners.
* Women who have unprotected sex with many different partners, especially if these include bisexual men.
* Men who have unprotected sex with many different partners.
* Prostitutes who do not practise safe sex. Also at risk are their customers and these customers' other sexual partners.
* Relationships in which one or both of the partners have many different partners.
* Drug addicts who share needles.
* Hospital workers who are at risk of pricking or cutting themselves with infected instruments or needles.
* Children with an HIV-infected mother.
* People who have had many blood transfusions or who were treated with blood products before 1985.

How do you avoid infection?

* Use a condom. This is not a guaranteed method of avoiding infection, but using a condom reduces the risk considerably.
* Avoid using drugs that are injected with a syringe. Do not share syringes or needles with others.
* Avoid blood transfusions in certain countries where they may not test the blood for HIV.
* People who have already been infected with HIV or belong to high-risk groups should not donate blood, sperm, or organs. [with exceptions -- actupny]
* Even if you have tested negative you could still be infected with the HIV virus. You may not have produced enough antibodies to indicate infection or were infected after the blood sample for the test was taken.

treatment involve and medication used

New and more efficient treatments to fight HIV and reduce the content of virus in the blood are being developed all the time.
Unfortunately, HIV is a very efficient virus that can change some of its own characteristics, mutate and create new HIV variants, which are resistant to the medicines used in treatment. To reduce the risk of developing resistance to the medication and fight the virus from several directions, you will be offered a treatment that includes several types of medication. These are:

* antiviral medicines against HIV that stop the virus from spreading in the body. You will not be cured and you are still contagious, but the treatment strengthens the immune system so that your risk of getting ill is reduced. It is still not known how long the effects of the treatment will last.
* specific treatment of infections occurring as a result of HIV.
* vaccination against illnesses such as flu, pneumonia, and infectious hepatitis.
* treatment of the symptoms connected with HIV infection and AIDS, for instance treatment of nausea and loss of appetite.

Possible deterioration

Eventually, serious illnesses may develop as a result of HIV infection. Commonly, these include infections of the kind normally prevented by the immune system:

* tuberculosis
* pneumonia with Pneumocystis carinii
* toxoplasmosis in the brain
* reactivation of cytomegalovirus
* infections involving the fungus Candida albicans
* cancer, especially skin cancer and cancer in the lymph nodes
* meningitis and encephalopathy, a brain disease which causes dementia
* death may occur as a result of illness.

Future prospects

The disease is seen as incurable. However, many of the illnesses resulting from the condition can be treated. Between 5 and 15 years pass from the time of infection until AIDS actually develops. Previously, those infected only lived for a couple of years after developing AIDS. Fortunately, with the new types of treatment available the survival rate has greatly improved.

based on a text by Dr Flemming Andersen and Dr Court Pedersen, professor and consultant
Last updated 02.06.2005

   Additional topics coming  (no pun intended) soon

Oral Sex and Infection risk     
Sexual Practices and Risk reduction     
Men and masturbation     Women and masturbation     
The male Condom     
Taboo on condom ads on Network TV    
The female "Reality" condom     
(and advice on using them)
Female condoms for anal sex
Gay men's use of female condoms
Smearing the Queer: Medical Bias in the Health Care of Gay
How to Have Anal Sex - Tips and Toys

The Failures of Abstinence-Only Programs  (2007)

information to protect yourself   written by the poz guy                  

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